


Who I Was, Who I've Become

by Sapphire09



Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Covenant (2006)
Genre: Alternate Universe - The Covenant AU, Bucky (as chase) just wanted to protect him okay, Bucky Barnes as Chase Collins, Bucky is called chase in this story, Crossover, M/M, Natasha also appeared briefly, Tony is still Tony, Tony's parents are still going to die, What if?, and adorableness, it's just not Bucky's (chase's) fault this time, maybe someday he'll appear again, mention of Obadiah Stane, obessive tendency, steve rogers appeared in the beginning, there's also rhodey, with all his genius
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-01-10
Updated: 2018-10-25
Packaged: 2019-03-02 23:56:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 5
Words: 16,757
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13329132
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sapphire09/pseuds/Sapphire09
Summary: Chase Collins wasn't the name that was given to him by his birth parents. Turns out, Chase wasn't his name at all. Instead, his mother had named him 'James Buchanan Barnes Goodwin Pope', though gratefully, 'Goodwin Pope' didn't seem to be the name his mother was using either, besides in the birth certificate. Chase was the name given to him when he was adopted since he was young enough not to remember the change.Anyway, that wasn't the important part of the story. What was important was this: Before Spenser Academy, Chase Collins had a life. A friend. While he wasn't lying, murder did come easy for him, there was once a time when murder wasn't something he would do so easily. There once was a time, a more peaceful time, when his childhood innocence was still intact, and all he wanted to do with his power was for this one person.“Please, don’t hurt anyone for me anymore,” he once said.'This isn't for you,' Chase thought years later, staring at the dead bodies lying in front of him.





	1. The Childhood Innocence

Chase Collins, born July 14th, 1988, didn’t know he wasn’t born as Chase Collins, the only son of Arthur Collins and Gillian Collins, until he was eleven years old. Instead, he was born of a nobody, with an unknown father and a mother that once was the Collins’ family maid, Winifred Caroline Barnes Goodwin Pope, before she died of an accident. Chase himself was born as James Buchanan Barnes Goodwin Pope, before the couple that adopted him changed his name.

Arthur and Gillian couldn’t have a baby on their own. Winnie was a good woman, and she left behind a son nobody wanted, still in a good age for adoption. Adopting him, instead of adopting the son of another unknown, was safer. Preferable. At least for the Collins, at the time. So, for the first eleven years of his life, Chase lived believing that he was of their blood, not knowing that even ‘Chase’ wasn’t the name his birth parents given him.

Growing up, Chase didn’t lack anything in life. Whatever his whims, his parents would provide. Of course, they were rarely home, with his father busy making more money, and his mother busy spending them with her friends. But, Chase didn’t think he was lonely. After all, his days were filled with tutors and instructors, teaching him ethics, maths, every knowledge he would need in his future. After all, he was the sole heir. He needed them to continue his father’s legacy.

It was to be expected. He was the only son.

But, when he was seven years old, he met a strange child, sneaking around the garden of his home. He has bright, golden hair and skinny appearance, thin and so much smaller than Chase. He was wearing clothes he’d never seen another child wore before. Bright blue t-shirt that didn’t look much better than the rags in his kitchen, and loose jeans rolled up  to his ankles. The boy was barefoot, dirty and definitely didn’t belong in his garden.

The boy’s name was Steve Grant Rogers.

He was the first boy Chase has seen that _didn’t_ wear clothes like Chase’s. He was _different_.

In a way, Steve was Chase’s first friend.

Steve was the sickly son of the neighbor’s nurse, who was hired to take care of the family’s grandfather. Steve and his mother stayed in the servant’s quarter of that house, since the family wanted her to watch over their grandfather 24/7. Chase thought they were nice enough, but Steve always seemed to hate the place and everyone in there. Steve said Chase was the only rich boy that Steve liked, and Chase liked it.

Steve was also homeschooled, but by his mother instead of tutors. Still, they thought it was one of their similarities. Chase didn’t know what ‘friend’ was until Steve, and for Steve, Chase was the first kid his age that he’d love to call ‘friend’. They grew close, like _brothers,_ Steve said. Even though their friendship was one of the few things Chase’s parents didn’t quite agree with, they didn’t to do much to stop them either. So, their friendship grew, until it was time for Steve to leave.

The grandfather Sarah Rogers had been taking care of passed away when Chase was nine years old. A week after the funeral, Steve sneaked into his room and told him he and his mother would move, now that Sarah’s service wasn’t needed anymore. Steve said they’re moving into somewhere in the city, and he heard his mother talking about a job somewhere in Brooklyn. Steve was excited at the prospect of the city, but sad that he had to part with Chase. They promise to send letters, “Always, everyday, okay?”

At first, the letters came steadily, once every three days, at _least_. Then, as time passed, it became five days. A week. Two weeks.

Eventually, a month passed before another letter arrived.

Chase didn’t want to give up on his first, and only, friend so easily. He made up scenarios, assumptions and excuses, for why Steve’s letter arrived so late. Maybe, Steve had gotten busy. He did say something about going to school now, instead of homeschooled again. Maybe, something happened in the post office, and they’re to blame for the late letters. Maybe, Steve tried to send them everyday, but once in a while, Chase’s parents or Steve's would intercept them so Chase didn’t receive as many anymore.

But, despite his thoughts, Chase wanted to see how Steve was doing, if the other kid missed him as much as he missed Steve. Steve’s address was written in his old letters, and he asked his driver, Mr. Wilson on how he can get there, if he was an adult. Mr. Wilson thought it was just a child’s curiosity, whims to know how adults get around if they don’t have a driver. He thought it was a good thing to get curious about, so he explained how to get into trains, how to get there from the nearest train station, or if he would prefer the bus, and how to get to the nearest terminal.

The next day, Mr. Wilson was fired when he lost the boy in their weekly outings into the city.

Meanwhile, Chase went, on his own, to Steve’s last address and went to the school Steve had mentioned in his letters, since that was where Steve was likely to be, at that time of day. The world was so big, he found, but somehow he managed to get to Steve’s school. There, Steve was surrounded by people his age, and Steve didn’t look so sickly anymore.

Chase knew Steve had other friends. Steve told him so in his letters. But, seeing it was different than being told through writings. At that moment, Chase hated Steve for the loneliness that now lodged in him. He was fine, before. He wasn’t lonely. But now, because of Steve, he also knew what loneliness is.

Chase went back home and decided to never send letters again. His parents only knew he was missing only five hours before he actually arrived home before they immediately fired Mr. Wilson. But, even so, they haven’t even called the police yet. He didn’t know what that implied, and Chase didn’t think he wanted to know for real.

Then, he told his parents that he wanted to go to school.

They sent him to the best elementary school there is. The kind where there’s an elementary school, a middle school and a high school enrolled in one big area, where students can live in dorms or in one of the townhouses. Where the children are rich like him, with the same kind of privileges and expectations. Where some of the kids he knew from his parents’ social circle, others he’d seen once or twice in television and newspapers.

Where no kids would ever look like Steve Rogers.

The beginning of his life at that school was _hell_ . Nothing was familiar since he had to live in the dorm. Despite being left alone far too often by his parents, he somehow _missed them_ , now when he was to live somewhere else that _wasn’t_ home. The children around him were also what he should expect, though he found that he had been hoping for _something else_ . Those children were annoying and some of them were mean and snooty. The nice ones were cowards and spineless and _not_ like Steve _(because, even sickly as he was, Steve had been_ brave _)._

_(It wasn’t their fault, but while Chase wouldn’t want his new friend to be like Steve, he didn’t want anyone less than Steve either, or so his child mind went)_

It was only after he met his roommate that it didn’t seem like _everything_ was hell on earth.

Tony Stark was a beautiful child, with chubby cheeks and wide, sparkling brown eyes. His dark hair ( _not blond, and just like that Chase knew dark hair is always better than_ blond _)_ seemed to be in a constant state of mess, but it looked so soft that Chase wanted to touch it. When he talked, his hands were always in motion and sometimes his words couldn’t catch up to what was in his mind, but it was so _cute_ that Chase found himself in a constant state of smiling whenever Tony started another of his _cute_ tirade. Tony Stark was smart, sometimes shy, with a small stature _(like Steve, but_ not _)_ but he never shied away from standing his ground.

Tony Stark was smart, _small,_ cute, _shy,_ good and _brave_ , overall the _best_ kid in school, and he’s Chase’s new _best friend_.

Being with Tony made school _thousands_ of times better. He was brilliant and always made Chase laugh. He made Chase forget _Steve_ to the point he didn’t think much about his first friend anymore. Though, he was thankful for Steve for making him know _friendship_. He might’ve never met Tony otherwise, at least until they’re both well into adulthood. Tony liked listening to him, and Chase liked listening to Tony even more.

Tony was the _best_ , Chase’s _best friend_ , and the only light in the school that was otherwise might as well be _hell_.

So, of course, when his Power first manifested at his 13th birthday, he was so confused and scared that he didn’t think of _not_ sharing it with Tony.

At first, Chase didn’t know what happened. Why things got destroyed or shattered, or _fixed_ on their own around him. Then, he tried to deliberately shatter the glass cup a snooty older kid had from across the room with his _mind_ , and it _shattered_ … Chase even tried to do the same thing he did in front of a mirror, wondering, and -

_His eyes turned pitch black._

It was at that point that Chase got scared, well and truly scared. Of course, he went to his safe place. To his dorm room. To _Tony_.

At first, Tony had a hard time believing him. Chase understood, Tony has always been science-minded. If it wasn’t because it happened to him, Chase knew he wouldn’t believe it himself. But, Chase was scared, Tony needed to _listen_ , to _believe_ , so he willed the metal Tony always has around him to _bend_ , will the glass and mirrors to _crack_ and _shatter_ , and he knew without a doubt, as the things in their room levitated, that his eyes have turned _black_.

And he did the one thing he didn’t know he _never_ wanted to do until he _did_ it.

He _scared_ Tony. His brown eyes were wide, but not in humor, not in awe, but in _fear_ , and -

 _God, he was so scared_.

At once, everything that had levitated was dropped back to the ground. Tony was still staring at him in horror and Chase wanted to _cry_ . So, he turned his back on Tony and went to his bed, burying himself under the blankets and _cursing_ the power that was in him, shaking and scared shitless of what having powers _meant_.

Chase didn’t know how long he was under the blanket before there was a hand sneaking in, reaching to him and touching his back.

“...Chasey?” Tony, it was _Tony,_ he didn’t _leave._

Chase turned, reaching the hand back with his own, gripping tightly and felt so unbearably _relieved_ when Tony’s hand gripped back. Chase could feel the bed shifting, a corner of the blanket lifted, and Tony’s face peeking inside, expression unsure and troubled, but devoid of _fear_.

Chase pulled the hand he was holding on gently, silently asking Tony to join him, and Tony, like he always did _before_ , climbed in and joined Chase under the blanket. They lay face to face under the blanket, and not once Chase let Tony’s hand go even as he cautiously snuggled closer to Tony. Then, when Tony snuggled closer back, Chase buried his head in Tony’s neck, letting out the tears that somehow came out of their own. Tony’s other hand was draped across Chase’s shoulder, while his own was clutching at the shirt on Tony’s waist.

In between Tony’s _it’s okay, I’m sorry,_ he also asked questions like _are you scared? Do you know why it happened? Do you want to find out together? What can I do to help?_

_(Yes, I’m scared. I don’t know why. Yes, please. Just stay with me, don’t leave me.)_

Tony stayed with him all night. Chase thought _this_ was why Tony was simply the _best_ . He was Chase’s _forever_.

_(Please, don’t let him lose Tony like he lost Steve)_

* * *

Tony helped him figure out his powers. By the end of the week, he already knew the powers responded to what he wanted, _anything_ he wanted. He could do anything his mind could _imagine_ . Whatever he wanted, whatever he needed, he could do it. There are some things, he found that he couldn’t do. But, he figured it was just because he wasn’t strong enough yet. It _felt_ like he would be able to, if he can get stronger, he just didn’t know how to get _there_ yet.

He didn’t tell Tony this until four months passed because he reveled in every of Tony’s expression when he saw Chase did something new. His excitement fed Chase’s own excitement, and even though he already knew _what_ he could do, it had felt like another discovery, an _adventure_ , for every time it was done in front of Tony. Tony had punched his arm when he told him, and later, Chase showed off just how much he could do, showed Tony the beautiful conjuration of the Galaxies and Stars inside their dorm room, the alteration of light in various shapes and forms, and the wonderful ability to heal wounds, the little scrapes Tony often got from his tinkering.

He treasured every expression Tony had on his face as he watched the wonderful things he could do with his Power. This moment was when he vowed, if there has to be a reason for his power, then it must be for this, for Tony’s expression, and the warmth in his heart.

Someday, when he can do so much _more,_ Tony will still be by his side, watching and praising like he does _now_.

* * *

_“Hey, do you think you can make something that moved? Maybe..... Ooh-ooh, a spider! Just a little one!”_

_“Oh, I haven’t thought of that before. Let me try.... Hmm... Not yet, I guess. But I feel like I can do it once I get stronger.”_

_“Ooh, awesome! Show it to me first, okay? I like those little cute ones, with long, thin legs and small body. Kinda felt it could be me if I was born a spider, you know. Little-and-Mighty. Hahaha~”_

_“Sure, Tony. I bet you’ll be the cutest spider, with brown skin and darker eyes.”_

* * *

Despite everything Chase knew he could do, trying to do them to hurt or injure someone was something he didn’t try, despite knowing very well that he _could_ . In fact, he could feel it would be the _easiest_ thing in the world, more than the things he already showed Tony. But, Tony wasn’t the kind of person to be impressed by something like that. Tony was the kind of person that didn’t care much if he got scraped, but a papercut to Chase and Tony would fret and insist on a band-aid. Of course, it wasn’t like since Chase got his power, they ever need band-aids anymore. But, that was the kind of person Tony is.

However, Tony was the smartest in the whole school, as in, his genius surpass even those in the high school division. For the length of their stay, Tony already skipped a few grades, enough to make Chase wonder sometimes how Tony could still be roommates with him, who Chase was sure in a different division. When Tony first started skipping grades, Chase didn’t feel much resentment, or jealousy. All he felt was sad, because then he wouldn’t be having much class with Tony anymore. But, while Tony’s genius was never a cause of resentment from Chase’s part, that wasn’t the case with other kids and Tony’s genius also often rubbed the older kids the wrong way, so of course, the bullying was inevitable.

_(Chase just somehow didn’t realize it happens until something happened in front of him.)_

There was a teenager, far bigger and taller than Tony was. He pushed Tony hard enough that Tony fell to the ground and hit his head. Chase only saw the red on Tony’s head before he decided that the teen _needs_ to _hurt_.

It was the first time Chase ever used his power to hurt someone, and Chase’s thought was right, it was the _easiest thing in the world._

A fire had burst from the teen’s back. It was quickly extinguished, but the burnt skin will leave scars. Chase thought it should be warning enough. He would’ve let the fire linger a little bit longer, but Tony had stood up and tried to help the older kid. He couldn’t let the fire hurt Tony. So, he extinguished it just as a teacher came to help the older kid, just before the flame could reach to Tony’s hands.

Tony’s eyes scanned the crowd, blood dripping slowly from his forehead to his cheek. A teacher was pulling at him, trying to drag him away to see the Doctor. Chase knew Tony was looking for him. Tony was the only one that _knows_ , it couldn’t be anyone but _Chase_. When Tony’s eyes met Chase’s, his expression changed.

Tony didn’t look -

He looked -

_(’Why are you looking at me like that?’)_

* * *

Chase waited in their dorm room. But, Tony didn’t come back that evening, even when he should’ve been.

* * *

“I don’t want you to hurt anyone for me,” Tony said at lunch. He looked sad.

Chase was sad. And _angry_. Because. Because -

“That kid hurt you,” Chase said instead, anger fusing in his voice. “He deserved everything I had done to him.”

“I can take care of myself!”

“I know you can, you’re the _best_!” Chase exclaimed. “But, what other use is there for my power if I can’t even use it to help you?”

Tony didn't say anything. His eyes only got sadder, before he closed them tightly and opened them again, this time staring straight at Chase.

“Chasey, I’m leaving school once this school year ends,” Tony said. “My dad already pulled some strings to have me graduate early. With my scores and the fact I already skipped a _lot_ of grades, the school wasn’t protesting it. He wants me at MIT soon. I’ve been hedging and stalling him this long, but I can’t anymore. I won’t be here after the break.”

Chase felt his world was going to end. It was worse than when Tony didn’t come back to their room last night. No, the thought of not seeing Tony again, ever, _this_ was _hell_.

Chase remembered he was yelling and denying, holding on to Tony as if he could stop him from leaving, ever, until he heard Tony whimpered out in pain when he held on too tight. The thought of having him stay, forever, with his power did pass his mind. The tendrils of his power, his want to chain Tony to their dorm room and _him_ so he can’t ever leave was already at his fingertips. But, before anything could happen, Tony reached back and his hands cupped Chase’s cheeks and he felt the soft press of Tony’s lips against his forehead, then he couldn’t do anything but cry.

“I have no one else but you,” Chase had said.

“Please, don’t hurt anyone for me anymore,” Tony had replied instead.


	2. The Teenage Angst

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tony's leaving for MIT. Chase was happy for his friend. He really did.
> 
> But, he was also just so.... bored. Of everything.
> 
> And his power was just so exciting.

After Tony left the school, they still kept in contact. They called each other every day, every night. Tony was the one Chase called when he woke up to an empty room and right before he went to sleep. Chase tried having another roommate, but after three nights couldn’t stand it. He then made an arrangement with the school faculty to let him live without a roommate for the rest of his stay at the school. He didn’t want anyone that wasn’t Tony trampling on his privacy.

School itself was a breeze. Still hell, but a breezy hell. Some other kids got it into their head to follow him around. Chase had no idea why, they were annoying, but they acted like they were his lackeys and, well. Whatever. Sometimes, they’re useful enough, though Tony was still the only one he thought worthy of knowing about his power. Chase painted on a smile for them anyway. Those kids can do whatever they want, as long as they weren’t besmirching Chase’s name, especially since he knew some of the seniors were aiming for MIT, and Chase didn’t want anyone there talking and making Tony think he had become a _bully,_ just in case.

Chase thought he did well enough in school. He joined the swimming team, his grades were the best in his year, and he was, according to the kids that flock to him, the number one kid in school. He was popular, guys wanted to be his friend and girls wanted to be his _girl_ friend. Even teachers don’t bother him.

It should be all he wanted. It was what all the boys around him _did_ want. Instead, Chase found himself wishing the guys would just disappear and die and the girls to shut up and die. His grades mean shit to him and the fact the teachers usually don’t bother him was probably the only good thing he was actually thankful for in the school. He didn’t even know why he chose swimming since he always hated how the water always found their way into his nose and ears - _wait, he did know, it was because Tony once stared at the body of a senior swimmer back when they were still roommates and said he was hot._

Without Tony, everything he did seem meaningless. His power was his only way to distract himself from the boredom that is the _life without Tony Stark_ . So, he messed with the bullies, messed with the nerds, and made a living hell for everyone when he got bored. Chase thought it could count as not hurting anyone since no one actually got permanently injured or scarred, not like the kid that got on fire. Chase heard he still has the scar, even to this day. No one could ever know it was him, anyway (besides Tony). Eventually, he used it for every mundane thing to make his life easier. Using the power for _anything_ at all, it always gave him a rush, something to actually feel good about.

“ _So, you’re using it to cheat,_ ” Tony said, deadpan from even across the phone. Chase scoffed as he switched his phone to his other ear and tried to change his school uniform to his sleep attire.

“I’m not cheating, Tones. I’m just using what I’ve been gifted with. Besides, even without the Power, I’m already the fastest swimmer here. And the smartest, since you’ve moved on to MIT. You know that.”

Chase heard Tony sighed.

“ _Just, be careful, Chasey. We don’t know if there’s a side effect of using your powers. Not for sure. I’d feel better if we can find something, anything, a folklore or something, about how your Power came to be, how it originated. I’d hate to find out if it turns out your Power took energy from your own life force or something.”_

Chase laughed, decided to foregone the shirt and threw himself on his bed, bare-chested and only in his boxers.

“It hasn’t done anything to me so far, I doubt anything will happen.”

_“You don’t know that. Not for sure.”_

Tony sounded so wonderfully concerned, it brought flutters of warmth in Chase’s heart. Chase smiled and turned to his side, curling around the phone wishing that Tony would be _here_.

“I’m okay. Really.” Chase assured. “But, hey. If you’re really worried, maybe you can help me find out who my birth dad is. My mom never told the Collins about his identity, but they said my mom implied he was still alive. That’s a good first lead, right?”

_“....When exactly did your parents - “_

“Adoptive.”

“ - adoptive _parents, told you?”_

“When they told me I was adopted.” That was years ago, before his power even manifested. Tony had held him then too as he cried and felt betrayed by the people that he had believed were his true parents.

_“...And you just never thought about looking deeper into it?”_

“Uh, no. Not really. He left my mom even before I was born. Why would I look into that bastard? The Collins weren’t perfect, but as far as I’m concerned, they’re the best I can get. If they never adopted me, I wouldn’t have met you. And you’re the best thing in my life as it is.”

There was silence from the other line that slightly concerned Chase, enough that he actually got up and sat on his bed instead.

“Tones?”

_“Uh, yeah… Sorry, I’m still here. Just, I thought…. By now, aren’t you supposed to have a girlfriend or something? I’m pretty sure there were some girls that had asked me about you when I was still there. I’d think she - they, whatever - would eventually become your best… thing…”_

Chase frowned.

“Wait, do _you_ have a girlfriend?” the thought was…. Chase didn’t like it. He _really_ didn’t like it. The thought of some _girl_ draping herself across Tony, _touching him -_

Tony scoffed _. “ Right, youngest kid at MIT, the only heir of Stark Industry. You realize what that means, right? Everyone here is of and above the legal drinking age and I’m the only one that can’t legally drink yet. So no, I don’t have a girlfriend, because I’m jailbait. They are College Student with actual student debt, Chase. They can’t afford to get involved with a jailbait. Moreover, a Stark. Even the ones that came from money didn’t want to incur the wrath of their parents, or my parents, for a _ scandal. _So, no. No girlfriend whatsoever.”_

The relief was so staggering that Chase let himself fall flat across his bed again.

“Well, I don’t have a girlfriend either. I don’t think I’m interested in having one too, anytime soon. Thanks to you, now everyone else just seems so _stupid_ in comparison.”

Tony laughed that beautiful laugh of his and Chase felt he would have a wonderful dream tonight, with the echo of said laughter still in his ears as he sleeps.

_“I guess that means we can still be single together on winter break? Do you have plans for where we should go this time? Although, I need to get back home by December 16th, the least. My mother wanted the whole family in one place this Christmas.”_

Chase smiled. “Yeah, sure. I’m thinking….” _somewhere beautiful, somewhere like -_

“Maybe abroad, somewhere like France, this time?” Chase suggested. He’d heard when one of the girls said it was one of the best places for a date and vacation, beautiful view, great food, and so on. His outing with Tony can’t be a _date_ , but it _is_ a vacation.

_“Sounds good. It’s a date, Chasey!”_

* * *

Tony found out _everything_ about Chase’s birth dad before the break and spent the entirety of their flight to Paris informing Chase about everything concerning his dad. Tony even prepared files and photographs, even though Chase knew how Tony found them tedious. Chase accepted the files with a smile and put them carefully into a leather bag he had purchased from the in-flight shop, so they won’t crinkle or tear. Tony did spend some time putting them together, so they’re _precious_.

Besides, Chase didn’t think he actually heard much about what Tony was reciting on his birth father, besides the name. Or, at least, he _heard_ , because how could he ever tune out Tony’s voice? He just didn’t think anything that Tony had said actually _stuck_. He missed talking to Tony face-to-face. Tony’s voice from across the phone never really sound like his real voice. And, Tony was always talking with bright eyes and hands moving, and Chase missed those. Besides, with all the seats around them empty, Tony could talk as much as he liked.

Chase didn’t actually _care_ about his birth father, or Paris itself. He just cared that Tony was there with him. So, when they arrived in Paris, they went wherever Tony pointed, going to a restaurant or stall that Tony wanted. Wherever that made Tony smile.

Later, Chase remembered that he hadn’t used his power at all, nor he had any urge to use them, since the first time he saw Tony back at the airport. Not even for tiny things he used to do back at the dorm, for mere convenience instead of need. Then again, Tony was so _close by,_ why would he want to distract himself from _Tony_ , even if it was to feel the _rush_ when he used his power?

Besides, not like Tony would appreciate Chase using his power to help the shorter man. He wouldn’t even let Chase carry his bag for him. Despite having a tiny body ( _or regular, as Tony_ insisted, _since Chase was the one that was too tall, in Tony’s express opinion)_ , he does have his pride.

Chase thought it was really cute.

* * *

They ordered a penthouse suite with two bedrooms, one for them each. They had a little bit of childish quarrel over who got the biggest bedroom, but then Chase had the bright idea to just share the biggest bedroom and use the other bedroom to put their things in. It wasn’t like they’ve never roomed together before, anyway. Tony did give him a weird look at the suggestion.

“We’re seventeen, Chase. There’s only one bed in that room,” Tony said, like it explained everything. Chase frowned, not really getting it. Sleeping together in the same bed wasn’t a problem back when they were roommates. Why should it be a problem now?

“So? It’s a big bed. You’re not that big. I think we can fit,” Chase grinned. He realized, since Tony left school, that he hasn’t slept quite as well as when there was Tony in his arms.

Tony still had a weird look on his face, but he relented, though he also griped since Chase also called him ‘ _not that big_ ’, so Chase thought it was still a win.

Besides, it’s December. Body warmth is still a thing, right? His power _can_ make the room feel warmer, if somehow the hotel’s system _magically_ broke down, but _body warmth_ gotta be the best way for it.

* * *

“Hey, can I borrow your shirt to sleep? I forgot to bring mine.”

Chase was relaxing in the bath when Tony barged into the bathroom. Startled, Chase slipped and cursed loudly as his movement splashed the water around.

“ _Shit!_ Tony, don’t you know how to _knock?_ ”

Tony walked closer to the bathroom, shrugging like he didn’t even care about the word as Chase righted himself. He then noticed that Tony was staring blatantly at his body under the clear, warm water, and was tilting his head in thought.

“Huh, all those swimming really does wonder on you,” Tony complimented, a small smile on his face. And that compliment _shouldn’t_ have made Chase happier and feel more accomplished than when his coach told him he broke his personal record by 5 seconds. But, it somehow _did_ anyway _._

“It does, doesn’t it?” Chase replied, grinning smugly as he lounged again, showing off his abs that he was pretty sure Tony can see under the water. Tony scoffed when Chase wriggled and showed off the contours of his muscles, then Tony bend down and suddenly splashed Chase’s face with water. Chase spluttered as Tony laughed, so Chase grabbed Tony’s hand before he could walk away and lightly pulled. Tony wasn’t ready for the sudden pull, so he lost his footing and fell face first towards the water. Chase made sure nothing really hit Tony’s body, like the edge of the tub, so the water was all Tony’s face meet.

Chase was ready for Tony to sputter when he came up and maybe splash more water to him in retaliation. It was what they used to do, back when they were roommates, and there weren’t anywhere else they had to be. Chase always took his time in the bathroom, especially when he was bathing instead of showering. The first time, Tony would bang on the bathroom door, yelling and complaining on how Chase took too long. Over time, Chase stopped locking the bathroom door and Tony would simply stroll in, doing whatever else while Chase took his time in the bath. Sometimes, Tony would splash water on Chase and their water-war would begin. Sometimes, Chase managed to get Tony into the bathtub with him and he would emerge like a wet cat and he would spray water at Chase using the showerhead in retaliation.

This was what Chase expected. Something he even missed, sometimes.

He wasn’t ready for Tony to wrench himself away violently and fall on his butt, backing away like the tub was going to bite him if he didn’t back away quickly enough, staring wide-eyed and pale at the tub and Chase, shaking and _scared_. The sight of Tony, hair wet and face pale, was enough to wipe the grin that was on Chase’s face entirely.

Chase cursed, afraid if Tony _did_ hit something. He was about to leap off the tub, check for himself, but Tony backed away even more when Chase moved. Chase froze in place, half-standing-half-crouching in the tub, the water moving around him.

“Tones?”

Tony blinked, eyes darting to every corner of the bathroom before his eyes found Chase again. Tony blinked some more, and then, it was as if some kind of fog was lifted from Tony’s eyes, because Chase felt like it was only _then_ that Tony realized there was only Chase in the room.

_(Who else could there be, but Chase?)_

“Oh….” Tony breathed out, eyes still wide as he stared at Chase, who still didn’t dare to move. His eyes then moved towards somewhere around his legs, around the floor, not really staring at anything but straight ahead. Slowly, Tony lifted his arms, putting them around his knees and hid his face in the space between them. He was still trembling.

Chase was worried, so he quickly grabbed the towels that was prepared near the tub. One to put around his waist, another around Tony’s head. Tony’s hair was still wet and dripping since Tony’s head had been almost wholly submerged underwater. Chase had the thought to use his power to dry Tony’s hair and his damp clothes, but he wasn’t sure if Tony would appreciate it right now. Chase was afraid that Tony would be scared again.

_(Chase doesn’t mind fear, fear made people leave him alone, fear taught people a lesson, but he never wanted Tony to ever fear him)_

Chase didn’t understand what happened. One moment, they were teasing each other, then suddenly _this_.

_(Tony was still shaking, even as he leaned on Chase. His skin felt cold and clammy -)_

_What the fuck happened?_

* * *

Chase lent Tony his shirt, the softest and most comfortable one he has. It was ridiculously loose on Tony, the sleeves went over his hands and the hem hung below his hips, but it was comfortable and warm. He also lent Tony his shorts, since the pants Tony was wearing was slightly damp and Chase had a feeling what was important for Tony at the time was to get dry and warm. Chase himself just took whatever shirt he had in his suitcase and a pair of boxers, whichever his hand first reached and be done with it.

Tony hasn’t said anything since his… _attack (what kind of attack was that? Why was it an_ attack _?)_ in the bathroom, letting Chase manhandle him to the bed wordlessly. It worried Chase, he didn’t know what _this_ was, why Tony reacted the way he did, _why it happened at all_ . All Chase could do was to sit there by Tony’s side, waiting for… _something_ , as Tony leaned heavily to his side. He didn’t know what to do. He didn’t know what he should make his power do, to make it better. He didn’t even know _what_ to make _better_.

“... ‘m sorry,” Tony mumbled out, almost inaudibly.

“...What happened?” Chase asked, since he didn’t know what to make of the apology, what Tony was apologizing _for_ , but still afraid and scared for _Tony_.

Tony leaned closer, if that was possible, pressing harder against Chase’s side. Chase would move, put the smaller man in his embrace, but Tony had _flinched_ when Chase shifted. He only relaxed again when Chase stayed still.

So he sat still.

“Tones? Please, won’t you talk to me?” Chase asked, trying his best to keep his frustration away from his tone.

It took him a while, but Tony finally told him.

“Some people don’t like it when a kid younger than them score higher than they are. Even more when that kid was me. MIT was no different. But, I always handled myself fine, Rhodey also protected me from the bigger kids, but usually I was _fine_. Just, it seems like their hate for me was the persistent kind since they suddenly ambushed me when I was alone.”

Chase wished Tony would mention their names. It would be so _easy_ for his power to make them _disappear_ , so whoever _they_ are can’t harm Tony anymore.

Tony suddenly slapped Chase’s shoulder with the back of his hand. “Put the glare away, I haven’t even finished the story.”

Chase rubbed his shoulder, not even feeling a little stung. There was still _something_ in Tony’s eyes, but he seemed to be… better.

He was still shuddering, so perhaps that was a _maybe_.

“So, I was ambushed,” Tony continued, determined now. “It wouldn’t be a problem if they just roughed me up. My dad _did_ have me trained in self-defense. Rhodey also taught me a thing or two. But, instead of _just_ roughing me up, they also -”

Tony stopped speaking, his hands shaking again. _What? What did they do?_

“They - uh… They… They took my clothes off and wrapped my head with it. Then they pushed my head into a bucket of water. They did it repeatedly, long enough that I thought I was going to die. They stopped when Rhodey finally found me, but he didn’t know _exactly_ what happened. When he arrived, the shirt was already on the floor and he just saw me wet. I didn’t tell him. I told him they just poured water on me. I didn’t think - I thought it wasn’t that bad. It was just _water_ …”

 _Waterboarding_ , Chase thought, remembering he had read about it somewhere. Somewhere filled with ways on how to torture someone. To _hurt_ someone.

“Give me their names, and I swear I’ll make it so they can ever _breathe_ another air again,” Chase growled, hands fisted on his lap. He noticed Tony leaned slightly back so he can glance up at him, staring again with unreadable eyes, before leaning his head on Chase’s shoulder again.

“It’s okay, I took care of it,” Tony said. Chase, confused, glanced down at the tuft of brown hair on his shoulder.

“I graduated. They didn’t.”

Chase was still confused. “...Okay, explain?”

Tony glanced back up at him again, staring through his eyelashes with a grin on his face.

“My paper destroyed each and all of their theories and research. I _crushed_ everything they’ve written. I practically _re-invent_ the definition of _physics_ and _engineering_ to disabuse and render their research null. I get to graduate even _sooner_ , while they have to repeat their research and pick another topic I _haven’t_ destroyed before they can graduate. Of course, I left others’ research alone, wouldn’t want my Rhodey-bear to graduate even later, right? But those guys, they’ll either just resign or keep going forward, re-doing their research all over again and have another year of college, while I’m already making my own billion and making myself richer.”

The _something_ in Tony’s eyes hasn’t disappeared, but he already had a smug smirk on his lips as he told Chase about his revenge. Chase smiled back, proud of his friend.

( _Still, if someday Chase found out who they are, they better hope they can hold their breath for long. Chase wouldn’t let them_ _breathe for as long as it needed for them to develop the same kind of fear of anything as Tony’s fear of water. Or,  maybe, his power can just make them fear. Then again, there's no satisfaction in that.)_

Then, Chase realized something else.

“Wait, does that mean you’ve graduated? Already? Ceremony and all?”

Tony grinned again. “Yup! I’m a college graduate now, baby! I even got four degrees, one for business, one for robotics, one for physics, and another for mechanical engineering!”

Of course, Tony wouldn’t settle for a simple _double degree_ . He had to have _four_.

“Oh, look at you,” Chase grinned back, messing up Tony’s half-dry hair. “A responsible member of society already! “

“Responsible? Please,” Tony scoffed, “I have no responsible bone in my body. My dad probably just gonna stick me in R&D _at least_ until I'm 21, or until I learn how to be more responsible, whichever comes sooner. I even prefer it that way. More fun, less responsibility, less stress on both me and him, even.”

Tony already looked so much better. He already stopped shaking, he was smiling and joking and laughing now, too. Chase’s fingertips could still feel the tip of Tony’s hair, still damp. That was the only sign left from their mishap in the bathroom.

Chase thought maybe he should find out who _they_ are anyway. Teach them a lesson.

Make them disappear.

“Chase? Come on, are you listening?”

Chase stared back at the top of Tony’s head, realizing now that the arm that once Tony had used to lean on now wrapped around his shoulder, the fingers brushing against the tip of Tony’s hair. Tony’s head was right under his chin. They both have leaned back, Chase leaning on the headboard while Tony was leaning firmly on Chase. Chase tightened his arm around Tony and he relaxed into it, even smiling a little.

Chase smiled down at Tony.

“No, sorry. What was that again?”

Tony pouted. Then he continued to regale Chase with a tale of his first AI, a robotic arm, and an extinguisher. Chase listened, even as he let himself slide down until his head was on the pillows. Tony stayed within Chase’s arm.

They fell asleep tangled together, just the way Chase had missed _all the time_.

In his dream, Chase dreamed his power could rend those who had hurt Tony to smithereens, wrapping their heaving lungs and gifting them to Tony.

_How unfortunate that he couldn’t do it in real life._

_Yet._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think things are beginning to get disturbing..... Hmmm........ 
> 
> Anyway, what do you think of this story so far?


	3. When It Starts

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is when everything changed. This is when it starts.

Chase stared blankly at the screen as the reporter repeated the same news, over an over, for the last three days. Changing the channel only meant having the same news being delivered by a different reporter, in slightly different words. But, the contents were the same. Even the pictures used were similar, enough that by now Chase knew the scene in every angle, every detail, in every crack showed through the photographs.

_“-of Stark Industries. As of now, it is still in debate whether-”_

_“-known for his alcoholism. It was suspected the crash happened because-”_

_“-dark times ahead, so the spokesman and temporary CEO of Stark Industries, Obadiah Stane, said. However-”_

And for all of Chase’s power, there was nothing he could do for events that already _happened_.

Chase was at home when the news hit. He and Tony arrived back at the States in the evening of December 15th, since Tony had promised his mother to be home by the time December 16th rolled around. Their time at Paris was _magnificent_ , despite that first night. Chase didn’t even use his power, _at all_ , in that vacation. He never felt the need besides in that moment when Tony told him about the bullying. Other times, he didn’t feel the _urge._ Not while he was with Tony.

 _(Sometimes, he thought perhaps his power really do exist_ for _Tony. There was barely any temptation for him to use his power, when Tony was by his side. In the rare times there was, Tony just needed to call, to laugh, to look at him and the_ want _was gone. But, when he was alone, without Tony’s_ anything _anywhere in his vicinity, his power was_ begging _to be used, urging him to feel the_ rush, _and all he wanted was to keep_ using _it even for the most trivial things.)_

The morning of December 16th, Tony had called. Apparently, there was a reason why his mother wanted the whole family together. She had wrangled Howard into taking his vacation days for a family vacation, too. She already booked three tickets for them, first class, also a reservation at a hotel in Italy. Tony had laughed, said that he’d never seen his father so disconcerted. There was nothing funnier than when Howard relented when Maria had put her foot down.

Maria even gave Howard enough time to finish up his last-minute business to DC. To make sure he wouldn’t bolt, Maria dragged Tony into Howard’s car, so they can all go straight to the airport right after Howard finished up his business. Tony then hung up, citing he need to get re-packed, _again_ . He sounded annoyed, but there was mirth and simply _happiness_ in there that Chase didn’t think he was _all_ that annoyed.

Tony called again, the same evening.

 _“God, you have to hear her, Chasey! She actually said, and I’m not kidding here, she said, ‘Get your ass into the car right now, Howard!’ and he just - went into the driver seat! Grumbling, sure, but it was AWESOME! They were bantering since we left home, and I swear there was a smile on dad’s lips when mom and I just, laughed, I don’t even know what the hell we were laughing about, but it was_ hysterical! _God, Chasey, the whole thing has been awesome, and we’re not even at the airport yet!”_

Chase could imagine that. He did remember how aloof Howard always was. Tony assured him the man wasn’t always that bad, apparently he had his own moments of softness, but still, must be a sight to see, especially for Tony.

“Good for you, Tones. Where are you right now?” Chase asked while nibbling on a cookie with his phone tucked into the space between his shoulder and cheek. His right hand was holding on a big bowl of sugar cookies, while his other hand had been waving around, directing his power to move the furnitures around to his liking. He was about to spend the rest of December on his own, so he should make himself comfortable for the time being. And, it should start by making sure the furnitures match his maximum comfort, with the plumpest and cushiest couch right in front of the biggest TV he has, instead of the pretty hard things with useless embroidery. But, he stopped when he heard his phone ringing and picked it up. When he heard Tony's excited voice, he simply sat down on the plump couch, deciding its position was already good enough. He moved the bowl of cookies to his left hand while his right hand flailed around, searching and reaching for the big fluffy blanket Tony sent to him for his birthday.

 _“We’re stopping in a rest stop right now. If dad had his way, we’ll probably keep going, but mom wanted snacks. And - oh my God, she’s buying Cheetos and Lays, Chasey! She’s also buying bottles of soda, and I’m seeing Coca-Cola among them! She also vetoed Dad’s beer, just narrowed her eyes until Dad put them back into the shelves. God, dad’s expression is so_ priceless!! _If you - oh wait, they’re coming back now. Bye, Chasey! I’ll call you again when we’re at the airport!”_

Chase blinked when he heard the line cut off, then shrugged. Tony sounded so happy and excited, and Chase was happy for him. It was probably a marvel for him. After all, it was practically a road trip with his family, including his dad. No wonder he was excited. Especially since his mom also seemed to strife to make sure Tony will enjoy it, even buying his favorite snacks for the road. While Chase couldn’t really understand the relationship Tony has with his father beyond the word ‘complicated as _fuck_ ’, he knew Tony always hoped for their relationship to get better. He knew Tony would see this road trip as his chance, especially with his mother there to buffer them both.

Chase smiled to himself, preparing to get comfortable in front of the TV all night while waiting for Tony’s next call. He has his sugar cookies in reach, water and hot chocolate, and the fluffy blanket from Tony warming him up. The TV has all of the Christmas Specials on marathon, from movies to TV Shows. He could catch up to some while he waits.

Three hours in, the program was cut off for a breaking news.

The Starks were dead, survived only by their son, who is in coma indefinitely.

Just like that, Chase’s peaceful world ended.

* * *

Chase never saw a person in coma before. But, he did read stories about them. How often was it that those books said the person in coma looked like they were sleeping?

Tony didn’t look like he was sleeping. There were too many tubes and wires connecting him to various machines around him. The only sound inside the room came from the steady beep of his heartbeat, the whooshing sound of his breathing inside the mask, and the steady drip from his IV. But, despite the various machines telling him that Tony was alive, making sure he stayed alive, Tony was too still. Too pale. _Too dead._

Chase thought that maybe, this is it. This is what his power was _for_. If fate truly was a thing, if destiny was to be believed and there were reasons for everything, then perhaps, this is why he has his weird, mysterious power. The power that sometimes didn’t feel like a gift, but a curse so seductive he couldn’t help but keep using it. The only time it truly felt like a blessing, a gift from the God instead of the Devil, was when he used it for Tony. That was how he knew it always was for Tony, it must be. He wanted it to be. His power always felt like it was more in his control whenever Tony was near. Everything truly good about his power, it was always for Tony.

( _But, there was somewhere in him that whispered_ no, it wasn’t. _That his power was just power, there was no blessing or a curse, simply a seductive call to guide you to your destruction)_

Chase ignored the whisper, reaching for Tony’s hand. Chase took a second to feel its warmth, though not as warm as it usually was, before he closed his eyes and _willed_ his power to make Tony’s pain go away.

It didn’t work.

It was as if his power had reached its limit, crashing into metaphorical barrier where his power can’t reach. No matter how much he pushed himself, he couldn’t wake Tony. He couldn’t make Tony _better._ His power was _useless_. He wasn’t strong enough.

_Useless, weak thing. Not enough. Not nearly enough._

He would scream out his frustration if it wouldn’t lead the guards and the night nurses to kick him out. So he held his voice, biting his lips until he tasted blood, and _planned_.

He _needs_ to get _stronger_.

* * *

With nowhere else to start, he studied the files Tony had given him. There was an address, his blood father’s most recent one, so that was where he started.

There, he learned more about his power, of the ascension and its consequences.

 _‘Look at that,’_ Chase thought as he stared at the wrinkled face of his father, who looked like he was over ninety when he was really haven’t even hit fifty, _‘You were right, Tones.’_

He also learned more, the origins of his power, notes and folklores in his father’s library. Everything Tony would’ve loved to know. Everything that Chase couldn’t care less about, especially about the stories of the five families that were involved in the origin of said power.

His father told him about their lineage, their legacy. About the injustice their ancestor faced and their banishment from the families. All Chase was hearing was about how his father was also a bitter, hateful man, wanting vengeance for a family Chase never even heard of before, to four other families Chase didn’t even care about. The hatred in the man’s eyes told him that the _vengeance_ he was talking about didn’t mean simple pranks or petty squabbles, instead something heavier. Something more _permanent_.

Something to _end_ their _lines_.

He then told Chase there was a way to get even _stronger_ after his ascension, and all he had to do in return was to take vengeance in his place.

 _“Please, don’t hurt anyone for me anymore,”_ Tony had said, long ago.

Chase left the place and didn’t look back.

* * *

The Starks’ family funeral was grand, attended by high military officials, ministers and governors alike. It was a formal occasion, but the absence of the son didn’t go unnoticed. While Tony wasn’t there in body, his absence was its own presence, hanging over those that cared for the family and him. Neither Maria or Howard had any extended family, but there was the family butler, a greying man named Jarvis, along with his equally aged wife who stood as their family.

Tony once talked about him, when they were roommates. The Edwin Jarvis, who was like Tony’s second father. It was Chase’s first time seeing the man, who looked even _(too much)_ older than the pictures Tony had showed, long ago.

When the funeral was over, the hospital was the first place he went to. There was already a black man in military uniform by Tony’s bedside. Chase learned he was the famed James Rhodes, Tony’s other _best friend._

They talked. They got to know each other. They got nothing in common besides Tony’s presence in their life. They didn’t know anything about the other besides the stories Tony had told them.

Neither of them liked the other much.

However, they reached a tentative understanding. From Tony’s stories and how the man acted with the unconscious Tony, Chase knew Rhodes liked Tony differently than how Chase liked Tony. Tony was Chase’s only friend, but Rhodes had a unit and more. Rhodes was the older brother, while Chase was… not. That was fine. Tony liked Rhodes differently than how Tony liked Chase, too. They were both the man’s best friend, but different kind of best friend.

Tony would be so pleased to see how they were trying to get along. He always wanted both of his favorite people to meet, though he knew it probably won’t go well, which was why he always postponed it. Now they finally met, and while it happened in Tony’s presence, Tony couldn’t see it.

He should. Chase would never even consider tolerating James Rhodes if he wasn’t Tony’s friend.

Then Rhodes left. Chase stayed in the room.

Chase stared at Tony’s unmoving form. His hand reached out to hold the hand lying limply on the bed. His mind wondered, _maybe today, maybe he can do it today, Tony should wake up and know what happened right in front of him while he was too busy sleeping_ . Then, he tried again. Another futile attempt even as he drained his energy. The block was still there, the _limit_ of his power.

Tony still wouldn’t wake up.

Chase closed his eyes, too tired to move away and laid his head on the bed near Tony’s shoulder.

_I need more power._

Tony’s words didn’t seem to mean much, not while the man was unconscious, with no guarantee of getting any better.

* * *

Chase only realized it was new years when he heard the fireworks in the distance. There are still nurses and doctors working through the night, celebrating with other patients that could celebrate and their families if they came.

Chase didn’t even know Christmas already passed.

“You’re still not waking up?” Chase asked to the room, still only filled with the beeping of the machines around them and Tony’s breathing.

“You love new years, Tones. You love starting the new year with new ideas and inventions,” Chase said again. Again, only the beepings answered him.

“We had a plan,” Chase said. “Christmas with your family, then New Years with me. We already planned it all, back in Paris.”

In the distance, Chase could still hear people, cheering and laughing, a distance away from Tony’s room. Chase glanced at Tony’s still form, undisturbed and unmoving, besides the slight rising and lowering of his chest as he breathes.

“This doesn’t count,” Chase said, his grip tightening around Tony’s hand. “Okay? This doesn’t. You need to be awake for it to count.”

Chase let out a shuddering breath.

“Please, don’t leave me alone too long.”

* * *

January passed by quickly. He only saw his adoptive parents just a day before he had to return to school. He didn’t feel like returning. But, he didn’t feel like staying either.

He didn’t feel like doing much, to be honest.

Using his power seemed like the only way he get to feel anything, lately.

At first, he tried to rein the _need_ in. He needed to learn how to control the urge before his ascension. But, he didn’t know since when, he found himself _always_ using the power, all the time. For everything. For nothing. It was only he truly tried to stop, on his own instead of just within Tony’s presence, that he realized how much he was using his power in his everyday life.

_(He couldn’t stop using it)_

“Please, Tony. I need you to wake up,” Chase whispered by Tony’s bedside. Tony’s presence was the only thing that ever stopped the urge. Now that he was actively trying to stop, it made him realize how _easy_ it was to ignore the call of his power with just one of Tony’s smile.

The power was seductive, it always has been. He didn’t need his gravelly and dying father to tell him that, he already knew. Maybe he didn’t in the beginning, but he was starting to realize it after Tony left for MIT. But, not using his power used to be a _choice_ , instead of a chore. Using it used to be his choice too, instead of a _need_ . He could see clearly now, the difference of control he had when he was with Tony and without. Even just the sound of his voice through the phone was enough to calm the _need_.

When Tony wasn’t there, his power became even more tempting, only the thought of what Tony would and wouldn’t approve stopped him from doing everything he was tempted to do. When Tony was there, his mind was filled with the thought of him, of his smile and his laugh, of his stories and his thoughts, that the power seemed insignificant. Unimportant.

Undesirable.

And now, Tony wasn’t there anymore. He was lying on a hospital bed, unmoving and unthinking, unsmiling. Unresponsive. And, if the doctors are to be believed, he will stay like that until his brain caught up that it was supposed to _die,_ if he doesn’t wake up.

Being near him helped the _need_ , but it wasn’t the same.

_Please, you have to wake up._

* * *

Chase only realized it was nearing Valentine’s Day when there were pink streamers and heart-shaped decoration along the visitor hall of the hospital. Chase missed school again. He wondered if his parents even knew how long he’d missed school already. Wondered if they care beyond the image it painted them.

February 14th came and he spent the day by Tony’s bedside, holding his hand and telling stories. He didn’t have much to tell, nothing was happening to him, after all. So, he made them up, about how his school was, about the swimming team, about everything that should be happening if he wasn’t so attached to Tony’s bedside.

He came with flowers and chocolate that day, to the amusement of the nurse he never bothered to learn the name of, but always there when he visited in the day. He chose the red and yellow-colored flowers, Tony’s favorite, and dark chocolates that was more bitter than it was sweet, another of Tony’s favorite, even though Tony couldn’t appreciate it.

The flowers withered and cleaned up within a week. The chocolates melted and Chase gave them away to the nurses and Rhodes, when he visited.

Chase wondered why he even bothered.

* * *

March came.

Nothing changed.

Chase forgot when was the last time he attended any of his classes.

“You’ll be appalled,” Chase whispered by Tony’s bedside. “So, you need to _wake up_ and tell me to go back to school. _Please_.”

* * *

April passed.

He wondered what should he do.

He wondered until when he had to _wait_.

He wondered if Tony will ever wake up.

(The thought he tried so hard to ignore, _what if he won’t?)_

“Please, Tony,” he cried. “Please, wake up. I’m lost, and I don’t know what to do. Please…”

* * *

“Aren’t you going back to school?” Rhodes had asked, in one of his visit. He was military, and he could only visit when he had leave. But, even he had caught up on how often Chase must’ve stayed by Tony’s bedside. Too often, people would probably say. He practically has been living in Tony’s room, last few weeks. The hospital only knew of his visits during the day, but Chase also sneaked into Tony’s room every night, far more often than his daytime visits.

“Maybe,” was all he answered with, though his eyes never left Tony. He didn’t need to look at the other man to know the disapproving glance thrown their way.

“What about your parents?”

“What about them?”

Rhodes stared some more.

Nothing was said between them anymore. They weren’t friends, and any words of comfort or anything close to a lecture will only be taken as an insult to Chase.

Chase realized then there was nothing in his life that was more important than Tony. Tony was, in literal sense, his world. There was nothing else he cared in the world, not his adoptive family, his school, or whatever else was there in his life.

When Rhodes left, Chase decided whatever the old man wanted, nothing could ever be worse than Tony’s absence. Months already passed and he already felt like he was getting crazi _e_ _r._ _He needed Tony to wake up before-_

Vengeance or whatever, if Tony would wake up...

_Surely, it can be worth it._


	4. The First Accident (The First Kill)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Everyone, everything, that stood in his way....
> 
> Why don't they just disappear?

Chase came back to where the old man resides, a question ready on his lips. But, when the words came out, the old man had laughed.

“The power was never meant for others, foolish boy,” he rasped through his aging throat. “The power _consumes_ , selfish and seductive in its nature. It ate at your life force when you used it, and it will tempt you to keep using it, to feed it _more_ of your life force. What makes you think it's _selfishness_ can ever be used for others beyond yourself? Why would you even _want_ to use it for others, when it ages you, shorten your own life, as you use it?”

“So, it can’t be done?”

The old man smirked, as if the question itself was so stupid it was amusing. As if the desperation in Chase’s voice only added to the stupidity.

“The Power can do many things, but healing was never one of them. Sometimes, maybe scrapes and light bruises, but even that was so rare it was doubtful it could truly work. It can _never_ be done, no matter what you do. Forget about your friend, he’s as good as dead, _boy_.”

Something like despair rushed over him. Hopelessness. _Misery_.

_Anger_.

“You don’t know me,” Chase growled. “You don’t know the _extent_ of what I can _do_.”

The old man laughed again in the face of such immature anger.

“You think you’re _that_ special, boy?” a smirk gracing the old man’s wrinkled and withered face, “The power you have had existed since my own father, and his father before him. I, too, have power like yours. _We_ know its limit, what it can or _can’t do_ . True, I can see you _are_ stronger than I expected, but you’re deluded if you think you are _that special_.”

Rage overcame him, though even as the furnitures whirled around the room, the old man simply looked on, unimpressed.

_Or, perhaps, he was too weak to even bother flinching away_.

“I can just kill you, old man,” Chase growled again. “If you can’t help me, then you’re no use to me.”

The smirk stayed.

“Well, if you do that,” the old man rasped back, “then I can’t will you my power, can I?”

Chase narrowed his eyes, still covered in black as rage and anger still swirling around his heart.

“What are you talking about?”

The old man, even through the chaos Chase created, explained about the Willing, of giving the gift of the Power to someone else with the same gift, with the price of dying in the process of willing it away.

“You’re not going to will me your power,” Chase said, snarling. The old man just rasped out a laugh.

“Of course not. Why would I do that, _now_?”

Chase let out a frustrated breath, eyes returning to their normal colour.

“Then, what’s stopping me from killing you anyway?”

The old man, though withered and wrinkled, still managed to look smug as he said his next words.

“Because, before I die of my natural death, I _will_ give you my power. But, only if you give me your word, that you will take my vengeance for my sake.”

Chase narrowed his eyes again.

“What makes you think that I will do your dirty work for you?”

“Because there are others like you. Four of them, other children of Ipswich. Imagine, if you can have theirs too, added to mine and what power you’ll have after your ascension. Maybe, just _maybe_ , bringing back your friend from his slumber wouldn’t be such an impossible thing, with the complete, absolute power in your hands.”

Tempting, _God_ , it was so _tempting_. But -

But…

The thought of Tony made him hesitate. The old man saw that and frowned, though then the smirk returned again.

“Try and taste your Power after your Ascension,” the old man rasped again. “I believe you’ll make your decision after you _know_ it.”

Chase narrowed his eyes, defiance and anger still simmering inside him. But, he turned around and left, leaving the old man behind.

He wanted to go back to Tony. He was heading back to the hospital. But, then he turned around and went back to his house.

The house was empty, but for the maids he didn’t know the name of and a butler than kept on changing every three years, so he never bothered to remember their names either. He went upstairs, the room he barely ever touched anymore, and trashed everything around to pieces, both with his power and his own hands.

He could hear the scared squeal of the maids outside his room, curious little _bitches_. But, no one dared to actually knock or even barge into his room. Even when almost all his furnitures were destroyed, when there was nothing else to destroy, he can’t calm down.

He _couldn’t_.

So he yelled and screamed and shouted and rip apart everything again. It wasn’t until he realized what was in his hands now,what he’d tried to rip apart last, that he stopped.

_(A familiar texture, something that_ shouldn’t _be touched by his anger, something_ important -)

It was the blanket Tony had given him. The blanket he was in when he heard the news. The dark, midnight blue blanket, made of thick and fluffy material that can still cover his whole well-sized body.

_(“...A blanket, Tones? I know you being in MIT and surrounded by college kids makes me seem young in comparison, but I’m not twelve.”_

_“Well, I remember you always got cold easy, with how often you used to go into my bed, so I thought hey, blankets! Besides, it’s big enough for you to curl in, you ridiculous Sasquatch.”_

_“You’re just sore because you’re short.”_

_“Oh, shut up. You’re making me regret stitching that for you. Just give that back if you ha-”_

_“Nuh-uh! No way, I’m not giving this back, it’s mine!”_

_“Hey, wait, you just said -”_

_“No take-backs, no take-backs! I’m keeping this, this is mine and you can’t take it back! That’s rude, Tones! Don’t you know that?”_

_“Uh…. Okay? You really don’t have to go all the way over there, I promise I’m not going to steal it back when you’re not looking…. No seriously, Chasey! My God, you’re ridiculous.”)_

And now, there was a rip on them, a big one, running from the edge right almost to the middle, leaving loose threads waving in the air.

His power had done that. Or, was it his hands?

( _Did any of it mattter?)_

Unbidden, the crying came. He bawled like a child, holding the ripped blanket in his arms tightly to himself as he fell to his knees. Somehow, he couldn’t stop.

Desolation. Dejection. _Despair_.

He cried alone, in a room wasted in destruction, holding a blanket ruined beyond fixing, wanting, _wanting_ , _for Tony to come and fix it_ . _To come and hold his hand and tell him he’s there, like he always did_.

_(But, Tony isn’t coming. Not anymore)_

* * *

It took Chase a week before he could step back into Tony’s room. Shame and guilt filled him, making him a little bit afraid to face Tony, even his unconscious self. But, when he saw Tony in the same condition as he remembered him, the despair returned. Still, he want for Tony’s hand anyway. He couldn’t _not_ to. He wanted to apologize for the blanket, for his anger, for not coming for as long as he did, but then he saw something that halted his thoughts.

It took him a while that someone had trimmed Tony’s nails. Then, he also realized that someone _else_ had shaved Tony’s stubbles and trimmed his hair. Someone _else_ had been giving Tony his sponge baths.

( _Someone else had touched him_ )

Something like rage simmered again, but it was tamer than the rage he felt with the old man. When a nurse greeted him, he put on a smile that didn’t reach his eyes and asked if someone _else_ had been taking care of Tony when he couldn’t come. If either the nurse or some _other_ nurse did.

“Ah, yes. There was a volunteer that has been coming in since last week, taking care of the patients that doesn’t have any family. He’s quite experienced with it too, since he said his mother was a nurse and showed him a little. He’s quite a charming young man, all blond hair and blue eyes. He should be your age, too. I remember he said his name was -”

“Tell him not to come here again,” Chase said sternly, still with a smile on his lips but steel in his eyes. The nurse was startled when she got cut off, frowning confusedly at Chase who couldn’t care less about the volunteer’s name, as long as he stayed _far away_ from Tony.

“But, Mr. Collins, Mr. Stark’s guardians has -”

“I don’t care,” Chase cut off again. “I’m here, I’m not going to leave him again. Taking care of Tony had been my job since he got admitted here, and it will stay that way until either Mr. Jarvis said otherwise or Tony wakes up. No one else.”

The nurse looked so offended that Chase had cut her off twice, but Chase didn’t care. Though he kept his smile, from the way the nurse had uncomfortably shifted away from him, it might have turned a little sinister.

“Very well,” the nurse had pursed his lips, “I will inform him and the administration, so there will be no other volunteer to get near Mr Stark’s room.”

Chase deliberately loosened his smile, said “Thank you, Miss.” before he turned away from the nurse.

The nurse stared at Chase for a second or two, before she scoffed.

“You don't even remember my name, do you? Despite I’ve been Mr. Stark’s primary nurse for a while now, and my name is so plainly written on my tag all this time.”

Chase glanced back at the nurse, half wondering if a nurse is actually allowed to speak to him like that. The other half just wanted her to go away. When the nurse noticed him turning back on her, the stare in her brown irises were challenging him. Chase simply kept silent, wondering what she would say next and how to best remove her in ways Tony wouldn’t terribly disapprove. After all, they are still in Tony’s room, and for Chase, it should be a sanctum where nothing Tony would disapprove should happen.

The nurse simply scoffed again and turned away from the room without a word. But, Chase could still hear the muttered ‘asshole’ as she walked away. When she was well outside of Chase’s hearing, he turned back to stare at Tony.

Who’s been touched by a stranger’s hand.

“Don’t worry, Tones. I’m going to clean you up.” Chase muttered, standing up to prepare for Tony’s sponge bath.

His mind was calm as he rubbed and massaged Tony’s skin in gentle movement, touching and caressing every inch he could appropriately reach.

“Sorry I didn’t come for a week,” Chase muttered out. “I didn’t mean to. I was just - no, there’s no excuse, I think.” Chase continued his movement, rubbing the limbs, torso, neck, and face, until he was sure Tony was clean. He then continued with trimming Tony’s nails again, until they were as close to the root as it could possibly be without hurting him, the way Tony always liked it. He couldn’t do anything about his chin, since whoever the volunteer was had shaved it cleanly off. But, he could fix the trimmings on his hair, so the curls can form in actual order, instead of the mayhem it was with the amateur cutting. He also washed Tony’s hair again, massaging and rubbing the way Tony used to like it.

After Tony was perfectly dried and clothed in clean hospital garment, Chase went back to his vigil by Tony’s bedside, holding his hand again.

“I’m not leaving you, I promise. So - so don’t leave me, okay? Don’t -” Chase whispered, choking and miserable as Tony’s hand clasped tightly within Chase’s hands.

The despair stayed.

* * *

May. June. _July._

There were no significant change to Tony. Even the doctors haven’t been very hopeful in Tony’s recovery as of late. He became simply another dying patient in the Hospital, waiting for the time his brain actually caught up to being _dead_.

Chase himself didn’t know if he actually had much hope left.

( _But, losing Tony, actually losing him, was too scary for him to actually think about, so he had to keep on believing he would_ wake up _)_

And, his birthday was nearing. His _ascension_ is coming. Maybe, _maybe_ -

_(Maybe, the old man was lying_ )

( _Maybe, he_ wasn’t)

He didn’t know what would happen in the ascension. He didn’t know what the _ascension_ will entail. His old man never explained the actual process and he didn’t ask, he didn’t want to ask. So, the night before his birthday, he returned back to his house, after making sure Mr. Jarvis would personally see Tony’s needs, instead of anyone else or even the nurses.

(He didn’t want anymore _volunteers_ to touch _his_ Tony.)

If something should happen, then as long as it was on the grounds of his own house, then it should be fine.

When he arrived, he knew neither of his parents knew he was there. He didn’t even realize they would be there, in the house, today of all days. Chase was used to have their absence in almost all year rounds. He got used to impersonal letters and expensive as _fuck_ gifts, gifts that never got as thoughtful or meaningful as the simple ones Tony always sent to him. He didn’t miss them, and he knew neither did they. All they cared was his education, how ready he would be if he was to inherit the Collins’ legacy. A legacy Chase didn’t even know if he wanted it. The only reason he even went along with their whims was because holding on to his adoptive parent’s empire meant he could still be around Tony’s future social circle. That was it. He just wanted to stay near Tony, and maybe found a way to support him with the Collin’s business. He wasn’t sure about business partnership, but maybe someday he can make the business grow to become more than simply an empire created from old money.

His parents were discussing something, heatedly. Or, were they arguing? He didn’t care for them, so he was resolved to ignore them and just headed straight to his room.

But, then he heard the _Stark_ name being mentioned. So of course he stopped and _listened_.

Chase knew his parents had their reservation about his friendship with Tony, but he also remember how his adoptive father had once tried to use it. There was a time when his adoptive father had reached out to Howard Stark by using their children’s connection and asked for a partnership of a sort. Chase knew it didn’t go through, but Chase didn’t think much of it at the time. Howard didn’t stop Tony from staying friends with Chase, and Chase had long since stopped listening to what his parents had to say about his friends. Or friend. If Tony wasn’t concerned then Chase wouldn’t too.

But, it sounded like someone was _very concerned_.

_“-ssion with the Stark boy has to stop! He’s been absent from school since the new semester started, Arthur! If it wasn’t because we’ve been paying them and his excellent grades_ before _, he wouldn’t even still be listed as a student! His obsession is affecting his school, his life, and his future! This has to stop.”_

_“And how do you think we can stop him? He doesn’t listen to us anymore. Except forcefully locking him in somewhere, I don’t think we can make him go anywhere he doesn’t want to!”_

_“Then lock him in! Take him away to a rehab somewhere! His obsession is an illness, it has to be. Take him away, anywhere that’s not_ near _the Stark boy!”_

“You’re taking me away?” Chase spoke out, eyes wide and pale. _Obsession_ , they said, like everything he had felt for Tony, the hurt and loss, the happiness and the _longing_ , were merely caused by something as cheap as _obsession_ . Like it wasn’t like he _really_ cared.

Like it was simply a psychological fallacy that he will get over once he _obsession_ disappear.

_(But, it wasn’t an obsession. Couldn’t be. How can it be a mere obsession? What he felt was stronger. So much stronger, than the word obsession)_

His adoptive parents glanced at him in surprise, before their stern faces quickly returned.

“Oh, good. You’re finally home,” his adoptive mother said calmly, while Chase was still unmoving from where he stood. His adoptive father merely sighed and already pulled out his phone, calling someone Chase could care less about. Probably their new chauffeur.

Chase glared at them both, “I’m not going anywhere.”

“Chase,” his adoptive mother chided, as if he was still a _child_ , “it is for your own good. You’ve been neglecting so much of your life, just for that Stark boy. You were doing things that a nurse could do just as well. I never begrudge you to visit your friend, but not if you’re throwing your life just for it!”

Chase scoffed. They didn’t understand, his life _was_ Tony. Nothing else was as important as him. What they call _obsession_ , Chase would call -

_(...What was it called?)_

“I love him,” Chase said in revelation, in awe of the _word_ , of the _name_ of his feeling. “I’m in love with him, he _is_ my _life_. He is -”

Chase then realized the horror, the disgust in both of his adoptive parents’ faces.

Just like that, Chase knew neither of them would let him go back to the Hospital peacefully.

Somehow, Arthur already got the butler to hold his arms behind his back, holding him in place. He should’ve known, his adoptive parents probably had planned this for a while. Maybe even just as a precaution, since Chase had noticed how the butlers have become more buff and bigger as they kept on hiring new ones. He held Chase in place and wouldn’t let him go. They would take him away from _Tony_.

( _His Power, just use his Power, and he could leave as easily as he came)_

But, before he could, there was a prickle on his neck. Chase looked to his side, watching his adoptive father holding onto a _syringe_ , before everything turned _black_.

* * *

Chase woke up to the gentle sway of a car in motion. He blinked and tried to move from his awkward position, but he found himself tied up. He couldn’t move his legs and hands. Chase groaned.

“Are you awake, Chase?” his adoptive mother called from the front seat. She almost sounded like she was _worried_.

Chase ignored her.

He heard her sigh. “It wasn’t like we _wanted_ to do this, Chase. You were just so _obsessed_ , with the Stark boy. It was cute when you were young, but when it just gotten worse, even after he moved on to MIT, we’ve gotten worried. You wouldn’t even come home anymore, Chase. You’ve spent the holidays we could’ve had together with him instead. We know we can’t always be home when you did, but when we did, you were always _away_ with him. Now, you’re even spouting things like being _in love_ with him. Can’t you see that we’re just concerned about you?”

Chase still ignored them.

“Don’t ignore your mother, Chase.”

“Where are you taking me?” Chase murmured instead.

“A Psychiatric Hospital, where you can be treated as you should.”

_Hospital for the Crazies_. Of course.

“I’m not crazy. Why are you taking me there?”

“You need help. Your _obsession_ have gotten too far.”

An angry laugh was bubbling from inside his throat. _Of course, they want me away, far away from Tony as they can get me to. They want to lock me in a secure facility, where I can’t ever touch him again. They’re taking -_

“Maybe it would’ve been better if the Stark boy had died sooner. At least you wouldn’t have gotten like this.”

(Rage. Anger. Despair. _Despair_.)

_They’re taking me away from Tony_.

* * *

**_What if they’ll take Tony away too?_ **

* * *

The thunder rumbled above the skies. Lightning flashed without warning, far too near to the car, enough for the Collins to swerve unexpectedly. Chase could hear his adoptive mother screamed her surprise, her fear, of the lightning.

“Oh my God, Arthur. That looks like it was close!”

Arthur looked surprised too, but the car didn’t stop.

So Chase made it stop.

Arthur kept stepping on the gas, confused when the car wouldn’t move forward. Chase untied all of his bindings and sat straight up, leaning between the front seats.

“You should’ve left me alone, let me do what I want. Let me stay with _him._ ”

Both his adoptive parents flinched when he spoke, surprised hearing that his voice had sounded so close. They glanced at him.

And _screamed_.

Chase smirked, his eyes now wholly black. He kept the doors locked when they tried to open the doors. Lightning flashed again, now striking a nearby tree.

The fear in their eyes, _those_ Chase relished in.

“You’re a _monster_ ,” his adoptive father breathed out, fear and anger mingling in his tone. “A _demon_ in disguise. You were never our _son_.”

Chase could feel the laugh bubbling in his throat as another lightning flashed.

“I was never your son,” he said. “You adopted me, remember?”

“Chase, let us out of here,” his adoptive mother tried, pale and shaking. “Arthur was - he was wrong. Chase, baby, we _know_ you. Please, let us out, and we can go _home_ together.”

“You didn’t know anything about me,” Chase said. “What I could do, what I _did_ , you know nothing. Not like Tony. He stayed with me, always. Even when he wasn’t there, he was still _with_ me. _He_ was my _home_.”

Suddenly, the car started again, moving in high speed across the road. Chase stared a little more at the panic on their face, their _fear_ . The knowledge how _easily_ they could die.

**( _They should just die_.)**

Chase smirked.

“You stood between us,” Chase said again. “And anything that stood between Tony and me should just _disappear.”_

With that final words, Chase let his Power manipulated the matter of his body, letting him phase through the car so he stood on the road, watching as the car speed towards the big tree by the side of the road. The lightning flashed the the brightest when the car hit the tree, the light enveloping Chase and he knew, he _knew_ , he was _Ascending_.

The Power in his hand now… _How can anything be impossible anymore?_

Chase laughed, the _euphoria_ his power granted him. _There can’t be anything he couldn’t do anymore._

The lightning receded, so did the light that enveloped him. Chase smirked to himself, before turning back to the smoking car. He decided to come over, checking to make sure they really died. He could hear his adoptive mother groaned, while his adoptive father was still twitching in his seat.

_Well, that won’t do_.

The fear on their face when they noticed he wasn’t finished with them was one of the better sights he had ever seen in his life.

_(But, not the best. Never the best. That spot was reserved for one person only-)_

* * *

Chase stared at the bloodied, lifeless body of his adoptive parents, sitting limply in the smoking and crushed car. He diligently made sure nothing could point to anything other than a car accident. He wondered back to what Tony had said, once upon a time ago.

_“Please, don’t hurt anyone for me anymore,”_  he said. Bucky smiled to himself.

_‘This isn’t for you,’_ Chase thought in satisfaction. _‘This is because they tried to take me away from you. This one is for me, because they kept on standing in my way to you.’_

Chase chuckled, the surge of his new Power still crackled in his hands.

This time, Tony would wake up. He should. He’s much more powerful now. Then, without parents standing in their way, they can live however they want. Tony will be sad, but Chase will be there for him. Always.

**_Together, forever._ **

Chase laughed, giddy at the thought, leaving bloodied crash site behind for other people to find.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's a little bit disheartening to see how little this story got responded. From the amount of kudos, for that amount of hits, I don't think the story itself was the problem..... The comments, when I got them, are nice too. I can tell some of you are (proabably) even really excited for this story. I know I got a message in tumblr that said as much. Just... can you let me know, though? Even just a word is enough, just so I know you really are reading (and still reading) this and think this is worth reading and actually want another update, not just, hit it, read the first paragraph, then 'meh, lost interest' and left. Though, since the hit count is low to begin with I guess technically, the amount of kudos I got is plenty enough.
> 
> I guess that Bucky isn't actually called 'bucky' here also responsible for this story not getting so many hits. Or maybe is it the crossover? I don't know if the movie was popular, but I guess it would be an old movie now.
> 
> I don't know, do I sound whiny? Just, I'd love to know more (again) what you think of this story. Also, I love you that have left comments so far, thanks so much! :D


	5. Hereafter

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A coda
> 
> This is not the end.

After some distance away from the crash site, Chase realized he had no idea where he was. The road was empty except for the crash site. While the empty road _had_ served him well, now it was simply an annoyance since he had no idea how to get back. He _could_ use his power ( _stronger now,_ stronger), but he wanted to conserve it for Tony. He didn’t know how much energy he’ll need for Tony, after all.

(Everything he had, if needed)

He thought about going back to the crash site, pretend he was a lucky survivor. But, he didn’t relish on waiting and doing nothing at all.

Well, he could pretend to be a survivor trying to look for help.

Still, he was too pristine to have been in a car crash, so he needed to do something about that. He didn’t want to actually roll in a dirt just so he wouldn’t look too clean, and the thought of slicing his skin open so he wouldn’t look too unscathed was just as appealing. But using his power to conjure the appearance of a lucky car-crash survivor certainly cost him much, _much_ less than outright teleporting back to his house.

Luckily, he didn’t have to walk for too long. In fact, not long at _all_. It almost made him wonder if _Fate_ itself was trying to help him, if such thing exists.

 _(Or the_ Devil _, but it wasn’t like he cared about such thing anyway. Not anymore)_

Just fifteen minutes after he gave himself the needed appearance, a car was driving by, stopped by him, looked at his properly horrified appearance as he stuttered, looking traumatized and pitiful before 911 was contacted. After, he properly cried as his status as an orphan was formalized.

Everything took far too long, in Chase’s opinion. At least _six fucking hours_ of his _life_ was wasted inside the police station, acting like a properly traumatized orphaned boy.

Thank God he was properly eighteen. Everyone else looked properly pitiful of him, but since he was of age, no Child Services were required to get him into a foster home or anything. His inheritance and his family lawyer also helped. After all, it was his _birthday_. Truly, the power, the _death_ of the people that wanted to keep him away from Tony, were the best birthday gift he could ever give for himself. If he can wake Tony, then it really will be the _best_ birthday present _ever_. Period.

 _(Wait, after Tony wakes, he is sure he’ll have better birthdays, just because it’ll be with_ Tony _, so maybe not_ ever _.)_

His lawyer, a woman with the reddest hair he had ever seen, had explained to him everything he inherited, everything that was rightfully his in the wake of his parents’ death as she drove him back to the Collin’s house. She also inquired about their funeral and everything else he needed to handle. The only reason he was still listening was because of how she was saying those things matter-of-factly. There were no soft tones or soothing gestures, careful tones that he kept on hearing back in the station.

“Can’t you handle those for me?” he had answered, properly pitiful and with the proper tremble in his words. But, his lawyer wasn’t fooled. She glanced at him without pity in her eyes. Without sympathy.

Like she _knew._

But, she turned her eyes forward again, looking at the road instead of him, and agreed without another word.

He wondered if he should be worried. But, his mind was only filled with _Tony, Tony, Tony,_ and the power in his hands, the power he now can wield, and decided there was nothing his _own_ lawyer can do anyway. He kept up with the act, because he could at least _not_ prove her suspicions.

When he arrived back to the Collin’s house, _his_ house, it was empty. No maids, no butler, no one else that could become Chase’s next target. He could see a pile of letters on the end table near the entrance. Resignation letters, written in haste. He wondered if they had an idea of what happened, if they resigned because of it. Or because they knew they wouldn’t escape Chase’s wrath in the absence of Mr. and Mrs. Collins.

Well, he could hardly care about them anyway.

No. He came back to the house just to change his clothes. He needed to be in his best _casual_ outfit. After all, Tony _will_ wake up. He _will_. And it wouldn’t do to have him see Chase in his _recently-kidnapped-by-meddling-adoptive-parents_ outfit. He was humming as he chose his clothes, a maroon shirt that looks good with his complexion, one that he bought because Tony remarked it would look good on him (it did, _does)_. Jeans in dark blue that accentuates the shape of his ass and his thighs. Shoes in bright, neon green to make Tony laugh.

Chase grinned to himself. Tony _will_ wake up. He will hear Tony’s _laugh_ again. And he’ll make sure he looks his best for Tony to wake up to.

 _With power like this,_ he thought, _what_ can’t _I do?_

* * *

Tony still wouldn’t wake up.

The world was crashing down on him, _again,_ the way it didn’t for the people that practically raised him. The way it _did_ when he first saw the news of the car accident that killed the _Starks_.

(Not Tony. At least, Tony is still alive.)

_I need—_

(If only he would just _wake **up**_ **)**

* * *

  **My Power**

**It wasn’t—**

**Enough?**

**How can it—**

**How much do I need?**

**How much _more_ —**

**How much—**

**How—**

**_MORE!_ **

* * *

 The old man was smirking even as life left him, the _life_ that flowed into _Chase_. Adding to his **_Power_**. Chase watched the frail, old body sagged down the chair, lifeless now.

A deal made.

Chase could feel the Power in him doubled than when he had Ascended.

He could call upon _lightning_ to destroy the old man’s _home_. He could _burn_ the house to the ground without anything more than a _thought_. The destruction he could bring now, the ability to turn the empty house to _dust_ , together with the empty husk of the old man…

And yet, he knew, even without trying _again_ , he needed **_more_.**

The power’s natural state was _hunger,_ destruction, and _chaos_. But _healing—_

He needed _more, mo **re—**_

The power that spreads across other four families. To have all of them—

**_I need all of them_ **

**_I have to_ **

**_I need more, more!_ **

**MORE—**

* * *

  **Tony, Tony, my love, wait for me. I will wake you. I will _save_ you.**

 **_For_ ** _give m—_

_… I need **you.**_

* * *

His old man had left him enough information of the Five Families that once founded the Ipswich Colony. Danvers, Parry, Garwin, Simms, and Putnam. Chase’s line came from the Putnam Family, the exiled one. The old man was really thorough in his notes on the Putnam family history, their lineage.

Like he cared about that.

All he cared was this: all the heirs, the sons of the four families, are now at Spenser Academy. All four of them, together in one place, in an Academy that might as well be owned by their families.

At least, money talks _everywhere_. Including an Academy that raved about its exclusivity and high standard.

And yet, the process for Chase to transfer to Spenser was laughably easy, especially with the entire fortune of the Collins at his back. It didn’t matter how long he had missed school. His old school even agreed to emphasize his (past) great scores and his (past) great record at swimming on his files to make everything smoother. The donations also helped move things along. Sure, it meant he would be a year older than most kids in the Academy, but it aligned perfectly with his needs. His family lawyer, the woman who seemed to _know_ , didn’t need much persuasion to help him smooth everything out. Sure, Chase still played up his poor orphan persona, though the woman didn’t seem to care for it. He could see it in the furrow of her eyebrows, though she also never commented on his act.

He could almost hear the question she seemed _dying_ to ask, but never did.

_(Did you kill them?)_

She did her job well. Did as she was told to the utmost efficiency. While Chase could care less about anyone his father employed, he still knew that his lawyer had been with his family for quite a long time. He knew how much of his father’s legal problems were smoothed out, thanks to her and her firm.

Chase wondered where his adoptive father had found someone as competent as Ms. Romanov.

Doesn’t matter, he mused again. As long as she did her job as is, then he figured he shouldn’t be concerned about what his lawyer may or may _not_ know. She obviously had nothing but speculation. Suspicious she might be of him, she _is_ **his** lawyer. Her job is to lay any suspicions _others_ had of him to rest.

Besides, he doubted anyone, even someone as brilliant as Ms. Romanov, would think _magic_ actually exists and had been used to _kill_ _._ No one except Tony.

And she’s not _Tony._

 _(No one else can ever be_ Tony _)_

* * *

Before he could leave for Spenser, he thought he should leave some word for Mr. Jarvis. Tell him he wouldn’t be able to visit Tony as often anymore. Leave a message that, if he really does need the help of a volunteer or a nurse or... anything...

The thought of a stranger touching Tony was still unbearable, but... Mr. Jarvis is old. He couldn’t even be at the hospital as often as he liked to. It was why Chase could be by Tony’s side as often as he did, why Mr. Jarvis couldn’t protest the amount of time he spent by Tony’s side. After all, who else could?

( _He couldn’t visit, not until—_

_Seeing Tony would—_

_He had to—)_

Chase stood in front of Tony’s door, not entering his room like he wanted to do.  For days now, _weeks_ , leading up to his time to move for the Spenser student dorms, he found himself unable to _enter_ the room where Tony slept. He didn’t quite understand, what was it in him that stopped his feet from going further. Even with teleportation, he couldn’t bring himself to teleport directly into Tony’s room. He just…

Couldn’t.

Even so, he could feel the turmoil of Power under his skin calmed, just by knowing that _Tony_ is on the other side of the door. Like he always _did,_ even before the Ascension, before the Willing. He wanted to see Tony, wanted to hold him. Keep him close in his arms and hear his _laugh—_

But, he… _couldn’t_.

He didn’t know if it was his power that wouldn’t allow him, dangerous as he is now (could it?)

Or if it was _himself_ that wouldn’t allow it, the meager little self-control that had started to dwindle in him, the more he used his power. The whisper in his head that sounded more and more faint with every euphoria he felt every time his power _consumed_.

( _But, his power, it would never hurt Tony. Never._ )

( _Would it?_ )

His right hand lifted to touch the wooden door. Just a push, a little _push_ , and he could _see_ —

( _Unconscious, coma, might never wake **up** )_

He _couldn’t_.

So he leaned his forehead on the door instead, willing the letter he brought for Mr. Jarvis to set itself on any surface inside Tony’s room. He won’t be able to visit Tony as often anymore. Not before he can gather enough _Power_. He can’t—

( _‘Please, don’t hurt anyone for me anymore’_ )

 _Shame_ , he thought suddenly to himself. _Is that what this feeling is?_

After all, Tony never wanted Chase to hurt _anyone_ , not for him. Tony would be so _horrified_ to know what Chase had done, what he is _planning_ to do.

( _Killing the people that raised him. Planning the murder of people he doesn’t even know_ _, for power. For_ **more** )

 _But that means he’ll be there to be horrified_ , he thought again. _He’ll be there to get angry_.

 _He’ll be t **here**_ **.**

 _(_ _It’ll be worth it.)_

Chase leaned back and stood straight again, his palm still flat against the door. He was looking at nothing but the door, the door that separates him from _Tony_.

He took a breath and let his hand fall to his side. _Inhale, exhale_.

_Today is the last day._

_Today he has to leave._

“I’ll see you again, Tones,” he whispered, promise in his words, before he forced himself to turn around and teleported himself out.

 _(He never was_ _much_ _good at walking away from Tony)_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whoooo~ An update!  
> Shorter than usual chapters, but it can't be helped.

**Author's Note:**

> I wasn't sure how this story would be received, though I still like the idea and at least 3 tumblr user liked the initial idea enough on Tumblr, so this shouldn't be too horrible. Here is the initial Fanfic Idea: http://valeriacreativecenter.tumblr.com/post/169443597855/fanfic-idea-the-covenant-aucrossover


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